When to Take the Puppy Plunge?
I love my wife, I really do. But she’s a cat chick. Not the kind of cat chick that was destined to turn into a cat lady, just a chick that liked her Joni Mitchell, a cup of hot tea and a cat on her lap while she read some John Updike.
I was able to beat the Joni Mitchell out of her (she did join us for Woodstock ’99 and now runs most mornings to Green Day on her iPod). But the cat thing lingered. Well, not lingered, her cats just lived a long time.
PUPPIES!
And they were cool, for cats, really they were. But a cool cat, to me, is sort of like a minor heart attack. It’s good, but still bad.
I’m a dog guy, always have been. We had two golden retrievers when I was a kid, one who came in when I was 2 and, after she died, the second came in when I was 14. Dog people like me just don’t turn into cat people, they don’t. I think some cat people can become dog people, but usually not vice versa. Must have something to do with all the licking – oh, and that whole loyalty thing.
So our young kids, 6 and almost 4 now, have grown up (so far) with cats in the house. They taunted them as babies, shied away from them as toddlers and grew to really love them. In the past year, we lost both cats to age and disease. It was very sad. But it’s been several months and I think the kids could use another pet around the house.
I want that pet to be a dog. Dogs are good for kids, boys in particular (not being a girl or having any girls, it’s hard for me to say what they’re all about). Dogs, more than cats, teach kids about responsibility (dog walking, picking up dog poop, etc.), they reinforce the idea of unconditional love (cats, let’s face it, didn’t get the memo on unconditional love) and they are great sidekicks for the adventures of youth (can you imagine taking a cat hunting for wild things in the nearby forest?).
The question I have is, when? My kids are 6 and 4 so I know now would be great for them, in theory. They could enjoy a puppy and grow old with the dog. By the time they leave for college, the dog will be 12 to 14, a ripe old age at a time of transition.But we live in a second floor condo, never a perfect place for a dog. My wife and I work fulltime and have demanding jobs and the kids are off at school/daycare until 3 every day. Is that fair to the dog? And what about travel? We still do a fair amount of it. The thought of puppy-friendly hotels or Cape houses – or the alternative of a nearby shelter – doesn’t exactly give me warm, fuzzy feelings. And, dammit, I know in my soul that I will be the one walking that dog on every cold, rainy, snowy, New England morning and night – not the kids, or the wife.
So I tell myself it was easier for my parents because, when they had little kids and the puppy, my Mom wasn’t working. And when we got our second puppy, we (the kids) were teenagers and could take on a fair amount of the care-taking.
I know, I know, there’s no perfect time. I tell my friends that all the time when they complain that they aren’t ready for kids. But at least with that, the biological clock ticks louder and louder and if you wait too long, you may be out of luck. What’s the downside of waiting too long to buy a dog?
So I’d honestly like some feedback here gentlemen, and ladies, when’s the best time to take the puppy plunge?
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Had same issue as well. Wife wanted dog for a while but we waited till girls were 8 and 6. At that age, they are able to help out with the dog (feed, take him out and play). As for us, the parents, we both work so we have to put him in crate all day, sounds cruel but it is not. Get home, set him free and do some training. On weekends, we spend time training him even more. Going well and he is fun. Been like this for several months and it works for the dog and family.
Had same issue as well. Wife wanted dog for a while but we waited till girls were 8 and 6. At that age, they are able to help out with the dog (feed, take him out and play). As for us, the parents, we both work so we have to put him in crate all day, sounds cruel but it is not. Get home, set him free and do some training. On weekends, we spend time training him even more. Going well and he is fun. Been like this for several months and it works for the dog and family.
David- we have a 7 year-old black lab named Brisco. Fortunately my wife & I have always been dog people, so I never had to fight the cat battle.
In terms of the “when” question- if you're going for a puppy then I think you'll want to wait until the spring. Housetraining is difficult enough when it's warm out, let alone when it's -20 outside and you're trying to get your distracted little pup to do his/her business. Don't worry about being gone a lot during the day, but do take that into consideration when you're trying to choose a breed. Some are prone to anxiety attacks when their owners aren't around for extended periods of time. When we first got our Brisco, there were several days a week when he's be alone in his crate for 8-hour stretches. We just knew that when we got home he'd need lots of hugs and a good walk, which we never minded. Wayne is right- the crate sounds cruel but it's actually quite the opposite. It helped immensely with housetraining, and it gave him a sense of security when we were away.
The traveling question is a tough one, but not a dealbreaker. There are lots of responsible caretakers who will be willing to look after the dog, and this is one of those things I'd put into the “we'll figure it out when the times comes” category. If you're lucky, you'll be able to find a person who's willing to take the dog on an occasional weekend rather than having to rely on a big dog shelter. Independent dog caretakers are a lot more common these days than they once were.
One other thing to keep in mind- the Harraseeket Inn up in Freeport ME allows dogs! They even put out a little dog bed and a special treat for when you arrive. Worst case scenario is Freeport becomes your chosen weekend getaway place, and you end up spending loads of money at LL Bean.
Good luck with your decision! I'm no expert but let me know if I can help in any way.
We actually got our dog (a boxer) before our 1 year old son was born. The dog is now 4 and is at a great age for a 1 year old. I would say that if you haven't been allergy tested (or had your kids tested) it is worth it. Turns out I am pretty allergic to dogs, but I just deal with it.
We have always been able to find either a family member or dog-loving friend to take care of our dog when we travel, and before our son was born that was pretty often.
All that said – I couldn't imagine trying to raise a puppy with a 1 year old. Maybe when we have kids that our old enough to help (walking mostly) I would consider it. Another note is that looking back we would really look at rescuing a dog that is about 1 years old. The major vet bills are done, they are fairly potty trained and they usually have an extra “thank you for saving me” love for you. Yes you lose out on some of that cute age, but that time goes pretty quick anyways. Just my $.02.
Hey — I like Joni Mitchell!!
I am SO a dog person. My partner and I have a pug (we live on the third floor of a condo in Canada, and the weather gets pretty cold here as well). We really debated about getting a dog as well as both of us work and we are usually out and about. However, we spend a lot of time with him after work and on the weekends and take him everywhere possible. We had him in training right away and that increased our confidence and his confidence. If we need to be away for the night we are really fortunate that my sister volunteers to look after him (she gets paid in caffeine-free diet coke and mini chocolate bars).
I would also suggest you really think about the breed you want to get. Certain dogs (like pugs) are more suited to condo life (as I am sure you know, being a dog person and all!). If you don't want to be out walking your dog 5 times a day because they have too much energy, a Boston Terrier is probably not for you
Bottom line: you are right. There is no good time, but if you are really ready then you find yourself making the adjustments. If it makes you feel better whenever myself or my partner has a day off and our dog is out with us he usually just sleeps, but pugs are like that.
Hey — I like Joni Mitchell!!
I am SO a dog person. My partner and I have a pug (we live on the third floor of a condo in Canada, and the weather gets pretty cold here as well). We really debated about getting a dog as well as both of us work and we are usually out and about. However, we spend a lot of time with him after work and on the weekends and take him everywhere possible. We had him in training right away and that increased our confidence and his confidence. If we need to be away for the night we are really fortunate that my sister volunteers to look after him (she gets paid in caffeine-free diet coke and mini chocolate bars).
I would also suggest you really think about the breed you want to get. Certain dogs (like pugs) are more suited to condo life (as I am sure you know, being a dog person and all!). If you don't want to be out walking your dog 5 times a day because they have too much energy, a Boston Terrier is probably not for you
Bottom line: you are right. There is no good time, but if you are really ready then you find yourself making the adjustments. If it makes you feel better whenever myself or my partner has a day off and our dog is out with us he usually just sleeps, but pugs are like that.